1. Aik train main daku ghuss aaye or pporee train ko loot lya, Beti:
daddy main nay apne ring save kar le or usay apne pussy main dal
dya, Daddy: Good .. Agar ye apne ammi ko bata datein to humara
SuitCase bhe bach jata......


2. Tention hai to charas loe,
dimag kamzoor hai to badam ka juice loe,
khoon ke kami hai to Anaar ka juice loe,
Mardaza kamzori hai to.. to .. to.. No Problem .. Mera Lund Choos
Loe..


3. Girl: I m like a radio, my left nipple is volume, my right nipple
id tuner,.. Boy turns both but there is no sound. Girl Said, Stupid
neechay Cell(batery) tera baap dalay ga.

4. Question: Why do most men prefer to kiss a woman's lips?
Answer: That's the best way to shut a woman's Horizontal mouth &
open the Vertical one...!

5.Once a boy came late to class.. Teacher said to him: tumhien
periods k miss honay ka zara bhe ehsas hai ? Boy Said: jee.. bohott
ehsas hai .. tub say jub say mere sister k periods aana ruk gaye
thay .. ammi bayhosh hoe gain thin abbu ko heart-attack hoe gaya tha
or mazay ke baat ye k humara driver bhe bhag gaya .... ;)

6. Larka Larki say: tum gana bohot acha gatey hoee ..
Larki: nahe yaar main to sirf bathroom singer hon,
Boy: acha... to kisi din bulao na dono mil k Mehfil jamatay hain ..

7. A Girl Sitting in Examination hall with Sardar je..
Girl: main aap ke naqal mar loon?
Sardar: Aahooo.. tu mere naqal mar lay phir main tere Asal maroon ga ...

8. Aankhein dewangi main laga baithay...
Dil Aashiqui main hara bethay....
Aap to award yafta GANDU Niklay...
KHUHRAY say bhe Gand Marwa Bethay...

9.Ek aurat apne padosi k sath sex kar rahi thi,
k tbhi uska pati aa gaya aur padosi ko pitne laga,
Patni boli: maro aur maro prai aurat pe hath dalta hai,
itne me padosi uske pati ko pitne laga,
Patni fir boli: maro aur maro ''NA KARTA HAI NA KARNE DETA HAI".


10. WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PERSON WHO IS COMITTING
SUICIDE AND A VIRGIN ? _ _ _ _ONE IS TRYING TO DIE. .......
THE OTHER ONE IS DYING TO TRY.....


11. One Mouse was fucking an Elephant in a coconut farm.
1 coconut fals on elephant's head.
ELPT-Ouch!
MOUSE-Ouch vouch kuch nahi Gandu, apna shot to aise hi hota hai.


12. What is pure Hindi name of Condom??
Rubber ki Chiknai yukt Prajanan virodhak mardana Ling ki topi.


13. Question : What is Long & Hard, has a hole at the tip and when u insert it into a wet,
hairy & tight hole makes u feel better?
Answer : Vicks Inhaler


14. Girl : Tum ladke kisi bhi ladki me sabse pehle kya dekhte ho?
Boy : Ye to depend karta hai ki ladki aa rahi hai ya ja rahi hai!!


15. Dur gaon me jab maa baap sote nahi the,
to bacha kehta hai, so ja bapu,
so ja, warna ek aur ho jayega!!!


16. non VEG
noN VEG
nON VEG
NON VEG
NON VEg
NON Veg
NON veg
NOn veg
Non veg
non veg

*
*

Muskura do yaar
non veg
message hai...



17. What is common between a
bus conductor and a gay Man?

Both shout peechey se Aaa



18.Iss aane vali thandi me aapko...

GHARWALI,

BAHARWALI,

SABJIWALI,

PADOSWALI,

COLLEGEWALI,

DOODHWALI,

KAMWALI,

FULWALI,
sab ka Pyar mile.


19. Yeh waqt nahin hai rone ka,
Yeh waqt hai baccha hone ka.
Uss waqt kyon nahin royee thi,
Jab chipak ke soyee thi
Ab jo kiya hai woh bharo,
Tab to kehti thi aur karo, aur karo...



20. Filmi names of penis.

1-2 ankur
3-5 masoom
6-8 parwarish
9-15 pariwartan
16-20 pyaasa
21-35 shikari
36-50 kabhi kabhi
51-60 kamchor
61-75 yaaden


21. Gabbar : Yeh haath mujhe dede Thakur

Thakur : Lele Bhenchod, lekin subah
8 baje meri gand dhone aa jaana!


22. Santa: Oye Murge kaise diye?
Murge wala: Rs 50, Rs 40, Rs 10
Santa: Rs 10 itna sasta kyo?

Saab ise aids hai....
Santa: de do mujhe khana hai
GAND thodi marna hai!


23. Election me jitne ke baad MANMOHAN Ji ne kaha

"Yeh to Sonia Ji ke hath ka kamal hai, Varna Is Umar me to mera khara hona mushkil tha."


24. Beta kya kaam karte ho?

"Ji samaj seva karta Hoon."

Matlab?

"Gire huve ko uthata hoon,
Bichade huye ko Milata hoon"

Woh Kaise?

"Bra banata hoon."


25. Beta kya kaam karte ho?

"Ji samaj seva karta Hoon."

Matlab?

"Gire huve ko uthata hoon,
Bichade huye ko Milata hoon"

Woh Kaise?

"Bra banata hoon."


26. 70 year old man says to his wife, Darling main tumhare liye chaand taare tod laaunga.

Wife replies, "Daant se roti to tootti nahi, gand se akhrod todne ki baat karte ho!"


27. Two girls returning from movie

1st: mere rupaye chori ho gaye!
2nd: tu to blouse mein rakhti thi phir kaise?
1st: muje kya pata saala chori kar raha hai.


28.Agar Gandhiji ke samay me AIDS hota to kya hota?

Toh chautha(4th) bandar underwear ke saamne haath karke khada hota.


29. Husband :plz. KARNE dona
Wife :nahi

Husb :PAKADNE to do
Wif :nahi

Hus :DABANE to do.
Wif :nahi

Hus :sirf DIKHAO to sahi.
Wif :nahi aaj to REMOTE pakadne nahi dungi uske BUTON bhi
dabane nahi dungi aur MATCH bhi dekhne nahi dungi.

Aj to sirial hi chalegi.
Aisa aap ke sath bhi hota hoga na


30. Kisi condom company ne world-cup ko sponser kiya hota to uski advt me aise likh te....

Cover your STUMP.
Before you PUMP!


31. Ansoo tere nikle to aankhein meri ho
Dil tera dhadke to dhadkan meri ho
Khuda kare ki apni dosti itni gehri ho,
Baap tu bane to Mehnat meri ho!


32. Machis aur Sex, donon mein
friction hota hi hai.
Bas, ek mein aag lagata hai,
dusre mein aag buzata hai,
par friction donon mein hota hai.


33. 3 gujrati women went to chaat shop.

Ist woman: manne chat.
2ND woman: manne ragdo(tikki).
3RD woman: manne pehle chat phir ragdo!!


34. Husband: Darling good night

Wife Aise kasie good night?
Pehle band kar light,
phir lund kar tight,
dubake kar fight,
jab nikal jaye white,
then i feel right,
phir good night!


35. On first night

Wife: aaj mera upwaas hai!

Husband slaped his wife and said
kya mere lund par aata laga hai
jo tera upwas toot jayega.